| When did Tom start playing music? |
|
Yes.
|
| |
| How tall is Tom? |
| Good question. While many fans report
him as being between 7'8" and 10'3", it is
supposed that they are not taking into account the height
added by the stage on which he is performing. Unfortunately,
due to his frenetic nature, Tom has never been accurately
measured. |
| |
| What is Tom's original language? |
| While Tom has mastered modern English
and several of it's regional dialects, he can often
be caught reverting to his mother tongue, Esperanto.
Tom also admits that he still counts in Esperanto because
it's quicker for him. |
| |
| Has Tom put on weight? |
|
No, absolutely not. In fact, in the past few years
the earths axis and distance to the sun have drastically
changed, forcing some body types to actually swell
and bloat, giving the visual impression of a 'weight
gain'. While this has provided inconvenient for certain
aspects of Tom's appearance, it has proved most useful
for others.
|
| |
| Is it true that Tom has children? |
| There is proof of Tom having two children.
We have not been able to get a statement from Tom about
the rumors of the underground mines run by 6 to 12 year
old slave children in Western MA that dig for the precious
Silvoralite Crystals that Tom uses to melt into bass
strings. On the other hand, there is distinct proof
that Tom uses his two children, 9 and 3 years old to
serve on him hand and foot, bringing him drinks and
chips while he watches television. |
| |
| How many eyes does Tom have? |
| Tom has an estimated 2 (two) eyes. Two
that you can see at least. |
| |
| Isn't that the same number of eyes
as Aristotle? |
| Careful scrutiny of Aristotle's unearthed
skeleton reveals that he, too, had 2 (two) eyes, although
scientists are reluctant to testify to that in a court
of law. |
| |
| Did Jim O'Hara actually play for the
Boston Red Sox? |
| Starting centerfielder, 1982. |
| |
| How old is Tom? |
| Here is another source of mystique surrounding
the 24 Hour Entertainer. Official documents collected
from the State of New York, the Commonwealth of Massachusetts,
and the Principality of Liechtenstein, vary his age
between 7 and 94 years. |
| |
| Is Tom really spelled T-O-M? |
| Yes, it is. |
| |
| Tom is an unusual name. Where did he
get it? |
| According to Tom's own response in an
interview with Diane Sawyer, his name was bestowed on
him by his parents. This practice, apparently, is not
uncommon where Tom is from. |
| |
| Is Tom richer than Aristotle? |
| Tom is often compared with Aristotle for
obvious reasons. In 1997 a Cambridge University economics
professor calculated the relative value of Aristotle's
peak wealth and compared it to Tom's. It should not
surprise you that Tom and Aristotle may claim similar
wealths. |
| |
| Does Tom know Homer's Iliad by heart? |
| Yes he does. In fact, back in 2001, Tom
recited the Iliad to school children in Roxbury, at
least most of it. The children hurled rocks at him after
10 minutes or so. |
| |
| Did Tom ever meet Aristotle? |
| No, he did not. Several years ago, documents
were discovered which authorities have verified were
written in Aristotle's own handwriting. In these documents,
Aristotle claimed to have seen Tom perform at a Senate
meeting. However, Tom has clarified on a number of occasions
that he never played the ancient Greek Senate. Scholars
now believe that Aristotle may have just been name dropping
to garner popularity. |
| |
| If and only if x = y, is the sum of
Tom truly 3.14? |
| Yes. This has been confirmed by the Massachusetts
institute of Technology. |
| |
| Are any of these FAQ responses true? |
| Yes. Absolutely. |
